” And surely as the tides rise and fall, when you get a divorce they’ll ask; “When are you going to start dating? Along with the occasional look of, “Mhmm, sure.” Meaning, if I could find someone to date, I would be all for it, but since I can’t…well then, I say I just don’t want to date.” Those questions can be entertaining, yet they can also be a cause of stress. Hard as it may be for some to believe, there are those of us who either aren’t ready to date or just don’t want to leap into the pool of dating, after a divorce.Two friends have recently tried to set me up with boys and I just don’t really seem to feel anything.When I try to explain to my friends that I’m only starting to get used to even talking to boys and haven’t yet gotten to the “looking at boys” stage most girls hit around fifteen, they pretty much tell me that it’s about time I did, as if it’s like flipping a switch or something.I was never particularly worried about any of this until my friends made a big deal about it. Is my not dating during my teen years the reason why I’m so stunted in the hormone department now? But you shouldn’t feel like you to do anything that you don’t want to do.Are romantic feelings and hormones like a muscle: the less you exercise them the more stunted they become? And you shouldn’t feel like you need to be anyone other than yourself.
” When you get married, they’ll ask; “When are you going to start a family? Not wanting to do any of those things is perfectly okay. Believe me, I’ve gotten my share of wide eyes of surprise when I say that I’m not interested in dating.
Let me say that there is absolutely nothing wrong with those who are ready to get right back on that horse again. I also think it’s great for those who shake their head at the idea of dating and just stay away from it, for whatever reason they have.
I can’t speak for other women, but my personal reasons are probably like others.
Let me tell you my experience and if it sounds familiar, rest assured you’re not alone. After my divorce, I was very quick to try and date. I felt unlovable and unwanted and I just wondered if anyone could and would ever want me again. So, I went out on a couple of dates and I quickly realized, I wasn’t ready.
I wasn’t ready to open my heart to anyone and more than that, I wasn’t ready to let someone new into my life.