Any time a black man walks around with a white woman he's giving off the impression that white women are his specific preference and that he has a problem with women of his own race, and because that applies to some black men who date white women, it becomes a label that all of us are subjected to. I totally get where black women are coming from, too.It's nothing to walk past a random black woman on the street and get a death glare and maybe even overhear something like, "They're taking all of our men." I was out with my white girlfriend at The Graham in East Williamsburg sometime last year and a black woman came up to me and asked me why was I dating a white girl when she can't even get a man. Truth be told, it's important to me that they also get where I'm coming from and know that I'm not one of these sellouts who views them as undesirable.
Sometimes white girls hid me from their family, especially their father. I had one girlfriend in high school who strictly forbade doorbell ringing. She was not going to go through the trouble of calling attention to the fact that she was going out with a black guy.
But because I know I'm not one of those sellouts, I feel no guilt about dating white women. A lot of white women have been extremely accepting of and loving towards me my entire life and that's all there is to it.
If anything, I just hate that there's such a vast misconception about my intentions from people who don't even know me. Though this very article was written in an attempt to bring context to these consistently misunderstood relationships, I don't have to explain who I date to anyone. I never really think about race while dating unless somebody else makes it an issue or I notice that the way a white woman I'm with looks at something is flawed because of her upbringing. I view it as an opportunity to educate and eradicate even a small amount of ignorance.
I've always just dated women who made sense for me.
I've never gone into it thinking, she should be white.